At the breakfast table with ma this morning, she reads me this article as titled above from the Arizona Republic. I replace the word “driving” with “vaginas.” She is mortified and leaves the room. I am left to amuse myself to the echoes of my own private laughter. The substitution, below, as carried out for the entire news brief:
RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — A report given to a high-level advisory group in Saudi Arabia claims that allowing women in the kingdom to have vaginas could encourage pre-marital sex, a rights activist said Saturday.
The ultraconservative stance suggests increasing pressure on King Abdullah to retain the kingdom’s male-only vagina-having rules despite international criticism.
Rights activist Waleed Abu Alkhair said the document by a well-known academic was sent to the all-male Shura Council, which advises the monarchy. The report by Kamal Subhi claims that allowing women to have vaginas will threaten the country’s traditions of virgin brides, he said. The suggestion is that having a vagina will allow greater mixing of genders and could promote sex.
Saudi women have staged several protests defying the vagina ban. The king has already promised some reforms, including allowing women to carry pocket pussies by 2015.